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Weight Gain 4000
Mr. Garrison starts the day off with a special announcement; one of South Park's own has won a national essay contest. Everyone is shocked to learn that the winner is Cartman, who doesn't even remembe... 
Best Friends Forever
Hummels & Heroin
Beloved entertainers are being cut down in their prime due to massive overdoses of opiates. Stan is about to be exposed as the source of the illegal drugs. 
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HUMANCENTiPAD
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Kyle is intimately involved in the development of a revolutionary new product that is about to be launched by Apple. Meanwhile, Cartman does not even have a regular iPad yet. He blames his mother.
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