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Ms. Garrison's latest date goes so badly that she assigns the class the book report over the weekend, but the boys hire immigrant labor to write it. Meanwhile, Ms. Garrison becomes a lesbian and saves... 
The Red Badge of Gayness
South Park's Civil War reenactment, sponsored by "Jagerminz S'More Flavored Schnapps," gets out of hand. Cartman persuades the drunken lot to defeat the northerners so that he can win a bet with Kyle ... 
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Dead Kids
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Sharon is overreacting to everything these days and Randy can't cope. Randy is desperate to help Sharon get her emotions under control and Cartman unexpectedly fails his math test.
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