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Mr. Garrison starts the day off with a special announcement; one of South Park's own has won a national essay contest. Everyone is shocked to learn that the winner is Cartman, who doesn't even remembe... 
Stan's addicted to a new app marketed by Terrance and Phillip, but the duo find that all the money they're making can't buy happiness.
World Wide Recorder Concert
The children of South Park are practicing "My Country 'Tis of Thee" for the "4 Million Child Blow," sponsored by Yoko Ono. Mr. Garrison doesn't want to go because his father still lives there. At the ... 
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I Should Have Never Gone Ziplining
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The boys are excited to spend a day ziplining in the Colorado Mountains. But high in the Rockys, far from their families, their trip takes a bad turn. Chances of survival are slim. All they can do is wait to be rescued. But will help come too late?
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