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Crack Baby Athletic Association
Cartman has a new protege and plans to help out babies addicted to crack. Kyle is brought in on the ground floor of their new business venture, the "Crack Baby Athletic Association". 
Cartman Gets an Anal Probe
While the boys are waiting for the school bus, Cartman explains the odd nightmare he had the previous night involving alien visitors abducting him from his bed. Meanwhile Kyle and Stan try to convince... 
HUMANCENTiPAD
Kyle is intimately involved in the development of a revolutionary new product that is about to be launched by Apple. Meanwhile, Cartman does not even have a regular iPad yet. He blames his mother. 
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Pandemic
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The boys find a way to make money off an international crisis that requires no talent and very little effort. Cartman convinces the other boys to invite Craig to get in on their latest plan. He knows Craig has just what it takes to make their dream a reality.
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