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Cartman manages to infiltrate the National Security Agency. However, after he discovers his personal file, he does not like what he finds and decides to tell everyone the truth. Meanwhile, Butters Sto... 
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Ms. Garrison's latest date goes so badly that she assigns the class the book report over the weekend, but the boys hire immigrant labor to write it. Meanwhile, Ms. Garrison becomes a lesbian and saves the women's bar from a Persian takeover.
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