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Stan is embarrassed in front of his friends when his dad gets pulled over for drunk driving. In a neighboring town, a bleeding statue of Mary is discovered and the faithful are flocking to the site ho... 
The Red Badge of Gayness
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Ginger Kids
Cartman suffers from a mysterious and sudden on-set of the disease, Gingervitus. Sick and tired of being ripped-on because he now has red hair, light skin and freckles, he rallies all ginger kids ever... 
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Tom's Rhinoplasty
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Wendy and Stan discuss their plans for romance. Principal Victoria comes into the classroom and announces that Mr. Garrison is going to be out and that a substitute will be taking his place. The lovely Miss Ellen speaks to Stan and he pukes all over his desk. Wendy is upset because Stan only pukes when he is in love and has Mrs. Ellen arrested for being a spy.
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